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Karen

Distance Makes the Heart Grow Distant and Cold

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We are often told that distance makes the heart grow fonder. That time and space between two people who are inlove is supposed to make them miss eachother and value one another’s presence even more. However, that’s not always the case. Sometimes, distance makes the heart grow distant and cold too.

In this article, let’s talk about how two people who are so much in love could end up in rough roads when you put distance in between them. Maybe not everyone, I don’t mean to generalize, but 70% of the lovely couples I’ve known did not end up together after going through LDR “Long Distance Relationship”.

Why the Heart Grows Cold With Distance

•Distance Makes You Forget

Waking up day by day without your love one’s hugs, kisses, touch. How cruel can that be? That’s the reason why people hate LDR, you will not feel eachother’s physical presence. And before you realize, if you put too much distance for a very long time, you will forget how eachother feels like. Touch is one way to communicate. Even without talking, you can feel loved through gestures and body language. But when you are apart from your lover, your mind and heart will little by little get used to the feeling of not being touched, until eventually, you might forget how it feels like.

•Distance Makes Your Heart Long for Someone to Be There- Sometimes, Desperately

This could happen especially if you are apart because of studies or work. It is very likely that every now and then, you will be facing hurdles and challenges. You will become stressed but no one will be there to comfort you. Until you realize you are looking for it in other places. In other people who are there. I’m not saying that’s excuse enough for you to look for someone who’s near. What I’m saying is that sometimes, it’s unavoidable especially if you are someone clingy, someone vulnerable.

Distance is not for the frail hearted ones. If you think you are someone who can be swayed easily, know that things might not end too well for you and your lover.

•Distance Could be an Excuse Not to Patch Up Small Fights

Yes, of course. Now that you are apart, no one can nag for you to make up as soon as possible. You can have time to be alone all you want. You can avoid patching up your fights as long as you can, it’s gonna be all up to you. But don’t you ever forget that the longer it takes for a small fight to get fixed, the more it’ll damage the relationship between you and your lover. He/she will feel that she’s powerless over that fight and you staying away for too long will only make things worse. So think things over.

•Distance Could Be a Reason For “Out of Sight, Out of Mind”

We can’t deny that human as we are, we have flaws and limitations too. Sometimes, no matter how we love someone, if we are away from them for too long, if we don’t see them often, we tend to think of them lesser by lesser each day too. That’s the reason why say out of sight, out of mind.

Factors contributing to Failure of Long Distance Relationships

•Time and Schedules

Since the world has different time zones, it’s very likely that you will be eating your breakfast in your lover’s dinner time. You will be having a good night sleep during his daytime. That is very important to manage for you to both make sure it’s gonna work out.

•Temptations

We can’t deny that even if we are in a relationship, we can’t stop other people’s emotions and feelings towards us or to that person we love. What’s important is that we know how to avoid for us not to be swayed.

•Communication

Enough internat data, time to catch up with eachother, time to listen and establish strong communication between you and your partner- these could greatly affect your communication. Once communication fails, don’t expect your relationship to stand still.

•Jealousy

Towards new people around them, towards those that are there when we’re not. We might pick fights, want them to avoid certain someone. These things would only show the weakness between you two. Work on it.

Long distance relationship is one of the very challenging phase to encounter in a relationship. Yes, some are strong enough to go through it and stand for the love in between the distance. But, there are also some who won’t be able to turn away from the negative impact caused by long distance between the couple. Above all, I believe that it is all under control, it can all be fixed and decided once you set your heart and mind to firmly stand up for your love. So if you have a partner from miles away, pray for your relationship and do your best to not let the distance make your hearts distant.

The Blogging Journey

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Since I was a kid, I was so much into writing. I wanted to write poems, and my love for my family. Sometimes, I write short stories. When I got older, my love for writing became deeper too, like it has become my way of communicating to my deeper emotions I couldn’t show. Until I got married. I became a stay at home mom. This new role has turn my world upsidedown.

Everything is new to me. The pressure and the pleasure  are all of different kinds of levels. I still write at times, in a page of a book, in the back of grocery receipt, in a bondpaper l under my son’s messy scribbles. Until someone introduced me to blogging. Everything was learned manually so I had to crawl my way there. But, I must say, it changed my routine, it changed my mindset, it changed my patience, it changed my life, all for the better.

How Blogging Changed My Life

•Medium of Communication

It became my way of expressing my thoughts, my emotions, it made me realize I am under control. Before, I felt so left out, especially when I became a stay at home mom. It’s like I got disconnected to the outside world. No one is there to listen to my rants, no one to vent out to. My husband is a great man, but he can’t understand everything about motherhood. Blogging has made me share to my village of mommies and made me feel I am not alone.

•Blogging Gave Me Friends

Because I connect with other people all over the world and talk to them about blogging, about a topic in my article, about guest posting, it made me feel like I gained a friend somewhere else. Especially if someone is so nice to me. It’s like blogging is my way of talking to my dear friends all over the world, in hope that I am also giving them something they could use and learn.

•Stress Reliever

They say being a mom of two is already stressful enough. Don’t you think blogging could only add stress that has piled up already? H*ll no! Whenever I think of nice thoughts to write about, whenever I think deeper, thoughts came overflowing and it makes me feel more relax and calm. Blogging could be stressful too, but mostly, it could relieve stress.

•Gives Me an Escape

From the daily routine, from the everyday mommy-wife life, from the chores, from the entire weight of responsibily in my shoulders, blogging is my escape. It makes me feel like I’m in a whole new world whenever I write about things from other mom’s perspectives. It gives motherhood a whole new view to look at.

•Monetizing Blogs

I know this will take time, this will take efforts and it’s challenging, but yes, you can monetize blogging. You can look for a client to work with, or you can personally grow your blog and make ends meet. It will take so much time, energy, effort, and sometimes money too. But, it is fulfilling and rewarding.

Starting from today, I will publish and share things that will be very helpful if you somehow decide to take the blogging journey. I will be sharing tips, guidelines, advices, and things you can learn from that will surely help you in your blogging. Good luck to us and cheers!

Why Its Okay to Sometimes Let Your Child Fail

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In today’s generation, kids are always cradled in their parent’s safe and loving arms. Oftentimes, it is overly done that we instill to the child’s mind that everything should be perfect, that there should be room for failure so they would succeed in their endeavors in life. In this article, I would like to remind my co-parents why it is needed for us to sometimes let our kids fail and get hurt, why we should not hinder these things to be experienced by our little ones. What good can there be? Stay with me and read on!

Why Its Okay To Let Our Kids Fail and Get Hurt

•Failure is an Opportunity

While its true that it could be make us parents feel worried on how failure could affect our children’s feelings and self-esteem, let’s not forget that failure could be an opportunity for our child to look at himself, evaluate what he could have done better and learn from the experience. As parents, more than being devastated over our child’s failure, it is our responsibility to remind our kids of the lessons they should pay attention after failing over something. Let us encourage them to do it again instead of staying disappointed. Cheer them up and encourage them!

•There’s Always Lessons in Failure

Failure could be hurtful in a sense that it could affect our kids emotionally and it might affect their confidence and self-esteem too. But, there are so much lessons in failure that sometimes, losing over something could teach us the biggest lessons in life.

Example, your child was playing with his friends afterschool. They have a new classmate who wants to join their team but they refused because they’re not sure if he’d be a help or a burden for them. In the end, their new classmate played in the opponent’s team and played so well that your child’s team lost instead. So, this failure from winning the game made them realize that they should not be too quick to judge just because that kid is new.

•A Failure Could Make Your Child Strive to Do Better

Of course, it is normal to feel sad and disappointed over failures. Who loves being the one at the losing end? No one! So, if you let your child experience failure, they will know the negative effects of it. It will become their motivation to strive and do more good the next time. It can make them think of different strategies to try on, it can point out where they failed at, and so they will know how to do better the next time. They will change what they need to change, try again and do better.

•Failures are Beautiful Scars

All the lessons they learned from failing, all the tears they cried because of being hurt, all the negativity it caused, all of these will soon become a memory, but these memory will let them realize the best things in life. Example, your child failed in a math quiz because she kept talking to her seatmates during discussion. After it, her seatmates got big scores but she failed. It could be painful for her, but it will make her realize that the friendship they made is beautiful, but it can’t help and save her during quizzes so she will learn that discussion time should be no time for chitchats.

Failure is sometimes interpreted as life’s downside. If we keep on instilling to our kids that failure should be avoided all the time, they will never see the beauty there is behind every failure. They will just dodge it whenever it comes along their way, they will become too weak to understand how life really works. They will become too afraid to gamble in life. And when they are old enough to realize that, it will be too late already, so many chances, and beautiful opportunities of learning life’s lessons could have passed already.

So Momma, don’t be too afraid to let your child face failure because one day, he will thank you for that. He will grow and become matured, ready to face ordeals by himself.

Why Giving Your Child Siblings is the Best Gift You can Give Them

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I personally grew up with 3 older siblings and I must say that I’m beyond blessed that I have them and I will have them for the rest of my life.

True enough that at early stages of life, our siblings are our competitors, our friend-enemies, but as we grow older, you will realize that instead, they had always been loyal allies who will back you up in every battle.

The Benefits of Having Siblings

As parents, having more than one or two babies is truly challenging and requires a lot of sacrifices plus more responsibilities. Let me change your mind on that matter. Yes it is challenging, but it is what’s right. Here are the reasons why it’s important for your child to have siblings:

•Helps Improvement in a Child’s Development

When there’s more than one child in the family, it is easier for every child to communicate, improve their language skills and their ability to connect with other kids. Thus, makes it easier for them to express themselves as well, becomes mature especially the ones who are older and it makes them develop sense of responsibility.

•They Can Be Source of Entertainment for Eachother

Children can easily be bored on an invironment where there is no one they could play with, especially those around their age. But if they have siblings, you give them a chance to have better and fun childhood days.

•You are Building a Bigger and Better Pack

Of course you can be excused if you have health issues. But like wolves, the bigger the number, the stronger the pack. Raising children is surely not easy. Yet, when they get older, everyone will be of help already and things will get better for everyone in the family.

•You Are Giving Your Child a Friend For Life

Sure enough, they will have fights, they will hurt eachother at times, but a sibling is a sibling for the rest of our lives. Your siblings are your first friends and the ones who will be your to-go-to whenever life gets tough.

•When Parents Die, Siblings Will be Their Only Immediate Family

Their aunts, uncles and cousins will still be there, but siblings are different. Those who are born from the same parents, will have strong connection and sense of belongingness towards eachother. In my own experience too, even if I already have husband and kids, my relationship with my siblings will always remain special to me. They catch me at times when I lose my sanity and not even my husband can help me.

Let Me Tell You A Story

I had a friend who is an only child. She was always happy and cheerful about having everything just for herself. Wants, needs, name it. She can have almost everything because her parents adore their only child. However, the only constant thing in this world is change. There came a time that her parents got separated. Her mom got cancer and everything went downhill for her.

She was with an amazing man and supposed to be having the best time of her life builder her own empire. Only that she had no one to share her troubles. From the medication of her mother, to raising her firstborn, to dealing with her father, she had her boyfriend with her, but she wished her parents gave given her siblings whom she could share everything with instead.

How about you? What are your thoughts on these matters? If you were to choose, will you have one child or more? Share it in comments.

How Loving Myself More Made Me a Better Mommy

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I once read that when you are a mom, you are the light of the family. You are the first source of love for your husband and your children. So let me ask you, do you think you can give yourself the same amount of love you give to your family?

The answer to that is definitely yes! And mind you, the more you love yourself, the more you become better not just in being a wife, being a mom, but being the super woman that you are! This is actually based on some mother’s journey of becoming the best version of themselves through loving themselves more than ever.

How I Changed My Mommy Life After I Loved Myself More

I will now be enumerating how and what I did so I can take care and give more importance to myself more than ever.

•Know That You Matter

Before you had your kids, before you had your husband, your world revolves around your own self. The only life that gives you life is yours. And just because you started building your own family doesn’t mean your no longer part of your priorities. Hey, you’re still you. And besides, a home won’t be complete without its light. You are the light so do your best to shine brightly. You are as important as everyone else in the family so appreciate yourself more and know that you matter.

•Discover Your Passion

When you do something that you really love,you will start feeling so good. Not only that you can monetize that, but you can also use that as your stress reliever. As for me, it took a while before I made up my mind about pursuing my passion in writing and start blogging. The first time i did a blog post and realized that other mommies all over the world are reading my blog, It felt surreal! I was so happy that I finally found what could truly stir my blood and soul. Then I started loving myself more. Little by little, I was showing to my kids the “mommy” that I am inside my blogs. I started living through it. Love came overflowing not just for me but for the entire family.

•Look Good, Feel Good

Before I decided on this one, I was a stay at home mother for more than 4 years. I looked ugly, and I think I looked pitiful those times. Not only that I don’t have enough budget for skin care and all, but I was thinking it won’t be good if I spend my husband’s money only to make me feel and look good when I’m not helping the family financially. But after taking a lift and started monetizing my blogging, It occured to me how much different it is to have your own income and start taking care of your wants and needs to take care of your looks too. When I started looking a lot better, I can feel that my eldest son, who is almost 5 yrs old now, felt happy and proud of that I did. For the firat time, he told me I am so beautiful.

After that, I can slowly point out how everything flowed so well for me and my journey in motherhood.

•There’s No Way that You Are Perfect, so Don’t Pressure Yourself too Much Over Things

Being a human, wa are bound to commit mistakes. Know that you are not a perfect mommy so give yourself a chance to do better next time. Love yourself in every stage of motherhood. When you understand that, you will become much more patient for yourself and for everyone around you. Try to keep your cool.

The moment you understand, acknowledge and appreciate yourself, you will start loving yourself more. By doing that, you also give yourself the chance to do better in being a wife and a mother, and of course, being a person who shed light among others and shine even more brighter for yourself.